One of the points that I try to drive home to new artists & bands is this: go out and make some friends that are doing the same thing as you. They don’t have to be making the same type of music (though that does help), but it’s great if they are in the same stage of their career or have recently been there.
“Make Friends” sounds like some pretty worthless advice. Here’s why it’s not: Friends help friends workshop songs. Friends take friends on tour. Friends introduce friends to people in the industry that they meet. Friends sing/play on friends’ records. Friends go with friends to industry events so you don’t always have to fly solo. Friends can relate to the struggle (“whhhyyyyy doesn’t anyone respond to my emails?! {sad emoji face}). Plus, unless you work for a company within the industry, you don’t really have “co-workers” who understand what you’re dealing with, so this is the next best thing.
No fake friends allowed.
I’m not over here saying that your goal should be to acquire a bunch of fake acquaintances solely for the purpose of using them to advance your career. I’m saying that it’s always a good idea to get into some social circles of people who can relate. Otherwise you’re over there on an island and have no one who really understands or can offer advice. Plus, some of the best ideas we come up with (for the business or in songwriting) come from a conversation with one of our music friends.
Why we know this is important: There was a period of time when we kind of “fell out” of the music circle in New York. I (Blair) didn’t really have any other manager friends and Ron had pretty much maintained the same circle of friends for years and years. Not only were we a bit lonely for peers, but we honestly didn’t know what was actually happening out there in the world. We had recently been on tour so we were incubated into our own little environment for about a year. Ron made a concept album and it didn’t really resonate with fans, which was a huge bummer. Things had changed and we didn't realize. We pride ourselves on knowing what’s next and for a little while we were somewhat clueless. After that we made a concerted effort to go out to shows, connect with old friends, have people introduce us to new ones, and really re-inserted ourselves back into reality. Lesson learned and it now shapes how we do business daily. Plus, we have more friends to drink with.
Lost on how to start the process?
Look for songwriting circles in your town. There are plenty of meetups of musicians, like you, who are looking to connect!
Go to shows constantly. Most cities have at least one small-ish venue that you can call home. You’ll start seeing the same people, so it’s easy to strike up a conversation if you know you’re into the same sort of stuff.
Look for official groups that you can join. Some have a small membership fee, but it opens you up to a world of new people & they usually do in-person meetups (example: Women in Music)
Utilize the power of the internet! Compliment someone on their release, their show, or WHATEVER. Never underestimate the power of flattery when it comes to making new friends, haha (no, but seriously).
REASON TO IGNORE THIS ADVICE: Your dad is Mick Jagger. You’re all set.